Sunday, February 20, 2005
Thursday, February 17, 2005
I am not the enemy, part 5
open season starts every spring
when the weather gives way to warmer thoughts and winter’s end
and the prey: laughing girls and tanning women
show less to show more.
they market the latest diet pills:
chewable outfits of anorexia
darting their eyes with the confidence of insecurity
hoping to catch his attention, her envy.
she will sell her soul for this love, this consideration
for she is convinced that glass slippers do not crack.
so on with the implants, the stilted fitted shoes,
the thick red perfumed breath of bulimia
the I’m-really-like-smarter-than-this-like-dumb-act-you-know,
that she titters for him
for this is open season
and she is prey
and prey run wild,
hunted for food, for sport
and the prey prays for solstice, a lover, a friend
never quite realizing that between the sheets
she is being gutted by the enemy
once again.
open season starts every spring
when the weather gives way to warmer thoughts and winter’s end
and the prey: laughing girls and tanning women
show less to show more.
they market the latest diet pills:
chewable outfits of anorexia
darting their eyes with the confidence of insecurity
hoping to catch his attention, her envy.
she will sell her soul for this love, this consideration
for she is convinced that glass slippers do not crack.
so on with the implants, the stilted fitted shoes,
the thick red perfumed breath of bulimia
the I’m-really-like-smarter-than-this-like-dumb-act-you-know,
that she titters for him
for this is open season
and she is prey
and prey run wild,
hunted for food, for sport
and the prey prays for solstice, a lover, a friend
never quite realizing that between the sheets
she is being gutted by the enemy
once again.
Saturday, February 12, 2005
Saturday, February 5, 2005
so frustrated. i saw Hotel Rwanda last night. i am very frustrated and disturbed. disturbed because of man's inhumanity towards man. awful. people who believe that the clan to which you belong solely defines you as a person is so strange to me. the scent of this ignorance is offensive to the nostril of the He-and-She. i watched in this movie men hacking up little children with intentions of wiping out an entire race. i've thought that we've evolved from those silly, pre-historic, Biblical days. the days when entire nations were killed because "it was God's will."
I was just disturbed that we as human beings can place so little value on humanity. Awful.
I walked out of the theatre last night feeling much like the tee-shirt I saw today in Hot Topic: I'm losing faith in humanity one person at a time.
I was frustrated by the movie, because the black life is worthless to so many people across this world. no one did anything to save the Watutsi lives from being massacred by the Hutus. the UN -- silent. the great war waging USA -- silent. other nations, with one exception of a Belgium man, -- silent! I am so tired of my skin being Enemy number one, not worth the price of oil. I wonder if Rwanda had something of value for the American government would they not have become involved. Why are we, as Americans, only interested in helping if it serves our interest? Doesn't the bloodshed of innocent children reach us? I was so disturbed by a line in the movie last night. A white UN sergeant was trying to get this black hotel manager to understand what was happening. He told the hotel manager that there would be no help. When the hotel manager asked why the sergeant said, "Because you're black. You're not even a nigger. You're worse than a nigger. You're an African." I felt like weeping.
Why are blacks hated so much? I don't understand. There is a worldwide hatred of blacks. In prison, to be a part of the Aryan Brotherhood you have to kill a black inmate. In Chinese, they have a specific derogatory term for black, though blacks have not had much contact with the Chinese. And I'm not talking about American Chinese, I'm talking about over in China. I had a friend from Puerto Rico who was not allowed to date black people because her parents wanted her with a Puerto Rican. However, when I asked if her parents would mind if she dated someone white, she said 'no.' Then I asked her if she could date a black Puerto Rican, and again, she paused, and said, 'No. My parents think they are beneath me." Growing up, I saw myself abandoned by "friends" if I were too much in their world.
I watched in America how the Rwanda massacre was down-graded to tribal warring. How genocide turned into casualities of tribal warring. How we as a worldwide community abandoned the children! Yet, we are so vocal about remembering 9/11, so gunho about killing Iraqis, ridding the world of "that" evil dictator.
I was so angry at myself for not doing anything. Of being aware of the happenings in the Congo and never doing a thing about it. I want to strip myself away from myself. I want my life to be a testament. Death holds no fear to me. I want to pursue the healing of this world, without a care for my life. It's so much more difficult now, with a wife and child, but the scent has rang like sulfur in nostrils of our Creator. What do we wait for?
I was just disturbed that we as human beings can place so little value on humanity. Awful.
I walked out of the theatre last night feeling much like the tee-shirt I saw today in Hot Topic: I'm losing faith in humanity one person at a time.
I was frustrated by the movie, because the black life is worthless to so many people across this world. no one did anything to save the Watutsi lives from being massacred by the Hutus. the UN -- silent. the great war waging USA -- silent. other nations, with one exception of a Belgium man, -- silent! I am so tired of my skin being Enemy number one, not worth the price of oil. I wonder if Rwanda had something of value for the American government would they not have become involved. Why are we, as Americans, only interested in helping if it serves our interest? Doesn't the bloodshed of innocent children reach us? I was so disturbed by a line in the movie last night. A white UN sergeant was trying to get this black hotel manager to understand what was happening. He told the hotel manager that there would be no help. When the hotel manager asked why the sergeant said, "Because you're black. You're not even a nigger. You're worse than a nigger. You're an African." I felt like weeping.
Why are blacks hated so much? I don't understand. There is a worldwide hatred of blacks. In prison, to be a part of the Aryan Brotherhood you have to kill a black inmate. In Chinese, they have a specific derogatory term for black, though blacks have not had much contact with the Chinese. And I'm not talking about American Chinese, I'm talking about over in China. I had a friend from Puerto Rico who was not allowed to date black people because her parents wanted her with a Puerto Rican. However, when I asked if her parents would mind if she dated someone white, she said 'no.' Then I asked her if she could date a black Puerto Rican, and again, she paused, and said, 'No. My parents think they are beneath me." Growing up, I saw myself abandoned by "friends" if I were too much in their world.
I watched in America how the Rwanda massacre was down-graded to tribal warring. How genocide turned into casualities of tribal warring. How we as a worldwide community abandoned the children! Yet, we are so vocal about remembering 9/11, so gunho about killing Iraqis, ridding the world of "that" evil dictator.
I was so angry at myself for not doing anything. Of being aware of the happenings in the Congo and never doing a thing about it. I want to strip myself away from myself. I want my life to be a testament. Death holds no fear to me. I want to pursue the healing of this world, without a care for my life. It's so much more difficult now, with a wife and child, but the scent has rang like sulfur in nostrils of our Creator. What do we wait for?
Movies! I haven't talked about movies and I'm a movie guy. I love movies. I prefer independent films. I have a large collection, over 1000 VHS and DVDs. A little obsessive, I know, but hey . . . it's better than drugs. I'm surprised that I haven't talked about movies at all. Well, I can't just pick out my favorites, so I'll start with movies that have had a tremendous impact on me.
Foreign
The Celebration. Rated 'R'. Warning: Very Disturbing. This is a Danish film. It uses jumpy camera shots to give the viewer a sense of its chaos. The storyline: A birthday celebration for this family patriarch. As with all parties, things don't go as planned. Small stuff at first, but as the movie progresses, you discover the hidden agendas of those who seem the most stable at first. Family secrets revealed or charged. Unspoken topics . . . spoken. Not a recommended movie for your Hollywood movie fans. Will not walk away feeling very chipper.
I enjoyed this movie because it stirred and disturbed me. I look for that in a movie. Does this movie make me feel? . . . not just lovey dovey or happy emotions. I want to be disturbed and challenged. I want to be changed. I recommend this movie to the adventurous spirit or the art house fan.
To Live. Rated 'NR'. This movie stars one of my favorite actresses, Gong Li. She is phenomenal in this movie. The movie takes you from 1940s China into the 1960s. It's about a peasant Chinese family trying to overcome the pressures of poverty and the Chinese communism regime. Gong Li's character, her husband, and two children experience many hardships and setbacks throughout the movie, but in the end pull strength in their ability to just live. It sounds simple, but the profound art of living is an artistry. The film was initially banned in China, as was Gong Li and her co-star for two years. This is certainly one of my all-time favorites, beyond a doubt.
Antonia's Line. Rated 'R'. Here's a summary from Amazon.com.:
"To a small Dutch town filled with characters known by such names as Crooked Finger, Loony Lips, and the Mad Madonna, Antonia returns with her daughter Danielle after 20 years away. Covering the next 40 years, Antonia's Line looks at the matriarch and her offspring, stretching out to her great-granddaughter, Sarah. A whimsical story with fairy-tale conventions, this movie deals with the cyclical nature of time as well as the strength of women. While this is not just a "woman's movie," men are regulated to the background in a story that tells of women breaking free of traditional roles. Surprisingly, this movie achieves a light-hearted tone while tackling serious subjects: small-town prejudices, rape, and suicide. Yet the drama's comedic heart shines through as Antonia collects a rather odd assortment of people, outsiders who become part of her extended family."
I enjoyed this movie when I saw it years ago. I saw it when it was in the movie theatres in '96. I love this movie because it is able to achieve what I so desperately try to do in my own shows, mix humor with tragedy. There are plenty of people who have a difficult time doing this, because it causes an internal conflict for them. It doesn't for me. I love when I talk about suicide in my show and have people crying then in the next instance laughing their guts off. It's a rush. It was C.S. Lewis who, after losing his wife to cancer, said, "The pain I feel now is a part of the happiness I felt then [when she was alive]." But not all people can grasp or embrace this concept. I have a good friend who was befuddled as to why I would wish prayers and laughter upon another friend of mine who had just lost her grandmother. This good friend of mine couldn't understand how wishing laughter would not be perceived as disrespectful. What he couldn't understand was that the memories that we have of a loved one, the laughter, the smiles, the tears, the journey are all a part of the sadness we feel when death arrives. Antonia's line achieves great levity in the face of sadness, because emotions such as happiness and sadness are not polar opposites but are knitted colors of a beautiful mosaic, reflecting the spectrum of human emotions. Antonia's line gracefully tells its story in this manner.
Foreign
The Celebration. Rated 'R'. Warning: Very Disturbing. This is a Danish film. It uses jumpy camera shots to give the viewer a sense of its chaos. The storyline: A birthday celebration for this family patriarch. As with all parties, things don't go as planned. Small stuff at first, but as the movie progresses, you discover the hidden agendas of those who seem the most stable at first. Family secrets revealed or charged. Unspoken topics . . . spoken. Not a recommended movie for your Hollywood movie fans. Will not walk away feeling very chipper.
I enjoyed this movie because it stirred and disturbed me. I look for that in a movie. Does this movie make me feel? . . . not just lovey dovey or happy emotions. I want to be disturbed and challenged. I want to be changed. I recommend this movie to the adventurous spirit or the art house fan.
To Live. Rated 'NR'. This movie stars one of my favorite actresses, Gong Li. She is phenomenal in this movie. The movie takes you from 1940s China into the 1960s. It's about a peasant Chinese family trying to overcome the pressures of poverty and the Chinese communism regime. Gong Li's character, her husband, and two children experience many hardships and setbacks throughout the movie, but in the end pull strength in their ability to just live. It sounds simple, but the profound art of living is an artistry. The film was initially banned in China, as was Gong Li and her co-star for two years. This is certainly one of my all-time favorites, beyond a doubt.
Antonia's Line. Rated 'R'. Here's a summary from Amazon.com.:
"To a small Dutch town filled with characters known by such names as Crooked Finger, Loony Lips, and the Mad Madonna, Antonia returns with her daughter Danielle after 20 years away. Covering the next 40 years, Antonia's Line looks at the matriarch and her offspring, stretching out to her great-granddaughter, Sarah. A whimsical story with fairy-tale conventions, this movie deals with the cyclical nature of time as well as the strength of women. While this is not just a "woman's movie," men are regulated to the background in a story that tells of women breaking free of traditional roles. Surprisingly, this movie achieves a light-hearted tone while tackling serious subjects: small-town prejudices, rape, and suicide. Yet the drama's comedic heart shines through as Antonia collects a rather odd assortment of people, outsiders who become part of her extended family."
I enjoyed this movie when I saw it years ago. I saw it when it was in the movie theatres in '96. I love this movie because it is able to achieve what I so desperately try to do in my own shows, mix humor with tragedy. There are plenty of people who have a difficult time doing this, because it causes an internal conflict for them. It doesn't for me. I love when I talk about suicide in my show and have people crying then in the next instance laughing their guts off. It's a rush. It was C.S. Lewis who, after losing his wife to cancer, said, "The pain I feel now is a part of the happiness I felt then [when she was alive]." But not all people can grasp or embrace this concept. I have a good friend who was befuddled as to why I would wish prayers and laughter upon another friend of mine who had just lost her grandmother. This good friend of mine couldn't understand how wishing laughter would not be perceived as disrespectful. What he couldn't understand was that the memories that we have of a loved one, the laughter, the smiles, the tears, the journey are all a part of the sadness we feel when death arrives. Antonia's line achieves great levity in the face of sadness, because emotions such as happiness and sadness are not polar opposites but are knitted colors of a beautiful mosaic, reflecting the spectrum of human emotions. Antonia's line gracefully tells its story in this manner.
Well, that's it for now. I will review and recommend some more movies another time.
peace.
Wednesday, February 2, 2005
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