“Why can’t I call you nigger?”



Whether after performing a show, a casual conversation, or a heated dialogue, I will often come across an individual or group of individuals who will ask me for my opinion concerning the “N” word. Most often the question is posed by a brother or sister of the Caucasian persuasion: why is it ok for black people to call each other nigger, but it is not ok for me to call a black person a nigger without being called a racist?


I am somewhat fascinated by this inquiry. Recently, I’ve been in dialogue with a police officer in a large southwest city. He posed the question the other day: “Let me ask this why can a black person call another black person a nig*** ok and if a white person does it then it is racist.” I am writing this response to answer him as well as anyone else who may have this burning question.


There are a few issues at hand here. I will do my best to break down these issues on historical, cultural, and personal levels.


Historically, the word nigger was used by whites to “put” blacks in their place. It was and remains to be a harsh word which has been transferred into a common word used by people from all walks of life. It was used to emotionally whip blacks into their inferior social status. It was also employed to distinguish, to lessen, the value of the Africans stolen from Africa. One’s status amongst other blacks meant nothing to the white people who used the word. A successful black individual was always inferior to the lowliest white counterpart. The word nigger was used to justify lynching, rapes, murders, tar and feathering, hate, and oppression. Here’s what the “wiktionary” has to say concerning the etymology of the word:

The term "nigger" has taken on perjorative qualities as it implies not only darkness of skin, but a general lack of intelligence and sophistication. At the time of the word's origin, various English speaking North American settlers who set cultural standards considered black people fundamentally inferior and less civilized. The term is generally considered offensive to black people not only because it singles them out on the basis of their skin colour, but also, because of its origin, it carries connotations of slavery, inferiority and oppression.>br>

Up until the 1960s, the word nigger, amongst whites, was not even seen as vulgar, yet to blacks, it was a constant reminder of the wall of hate and oppression that blacks felt from whites. But when and why did this word start being used by blacks in reference to themselves and other blacks? This is the cultural piece.


Before I delve into the transition of the word “nigger” from the white population to the black population, allow me to share a story that may highlight its development. From when I was young, I played football. I loved it. Prior to high school, I was considered a talented, slippery running back. I could duck and weave with the best of them. In high school, I was also a running back, but during my freshman year, I had an experience that would forever alter my self-perception and skill set in football. During a practice, I had dropped a couple of passes. My coach immediately nicknamed me “Stone Hands”. From that point on, catching a pass became a monumental task; after all, if you have stone hands, how can you catch a pass? This name stuck with me throughout high school. Whenever a ball was thrown my way, my anxiety shot up and I panicked. About 90% of the time, I dropped the ball. Was I incapable of catching a football? By no means. But then, what was the problem? I started to believe in the pejorative moniker that was delegated to me. I was Stone Hands. I remember even joking about it as I ran down the field to catch a pass. “Watch out people here comes Stone Hands.” It also became the way that others, (whether they knew about the history of the name or not), would refer to me. I adopted that name and saw myself as that name after the habitual battering into my psyche.


It wasn’t until years later when I was playing a pick-up game with some friends that one of my friends made a comment about how of good a receiver I am. He said, “Man, you don’t drop nothing! You’re like Jerry Rice.” And in that instant, my palms started to sweat, my eyes darted, and my heart raced. I felt uncomfortable because I only knew myself as Stone Hands, but I had forgotten that memory for a little while. Not surprisingly, the very next pass, I dropped it.


But what does this have to do with blacks referring to themselves as niggers? As was stated earlier, blacks were referred to as niggers by whites. This has had irreparable damages on the psyche of many African-Americans. Blacks started using the word to denote a demarcation between each other. A black man calling another black man a “nigger” was an insult learned from their slave masters. It was initially a term of contempt, a suggestion, if you will, of one’s status within the black community. “I am better than you, therefore, you are a nigger and I am not.”


As time went on, the black community ceased this word for themselves, symbolically asking, “Why must the word that these slave owners gave us be used negatively?” And then the explosion of the word nigger, in the black community, began to happen. Even the spelling changed – nigga. It became a term of friendship, of comraderie; it was a badge to show how true to black one was. The more of a “nigga”, the more cool and tough one was.


Blacks have taken what was once negative and turned it into a mostly positive term. Granted, the term “nigger” is not devoid of the negative connotations even within the black community. In rap music, the term can move from a term of endearment to a term of contempt. “They is my niggas,” is a positive usage of the word; whereas, “Cuz I will kill a nigga, if he looks at me,” is a more negative framework for the word.


Certain blacks who use the word “nigga” see themselves as “niggas,” ruthless and representing some ideal of what it means to be stereotypically black. The thug, the real “nigga” carries weapons, sells drugs, and is the definition of “cool” from about age 40 down. At other times, “nigger” or “nigga” is used for poetic emphasis, as in “Nigga, please!” or Nikki Giovanni’s poem, “Nigger can you kill?” These are all examples of the cultural shift of the word.


Allow me now to address my personal feelings of the word. My sister Michele will call me on the phone, and usually her first words are, “Whud up, nigga?” I don’t find it offensive, because it is not offensive. When I call Michele I will say to her, “Whud up, Negra?” I use a variation of the word, but I personally have trouble using the word itself. It is for this chief reason why I struggle with most rap artists in the Hip Hop community. Psychologically, I believe it is damaging an already fragile psyche. I try to promote the words “Doc,” brother, sister, cuz, dawg, or homie. I am not a big fan of calling other blacks – “nigga” or nigger.


What is intriguing about all of this, though, is the mentality of whites who ask me, “Why can’t we call you nigger anymore?” “Why are we racist when we use the word?” It’s no more complex than this: If you are white and you use the word nigger, it is not a word of friendship or of loyalty. It is racist because it is racist. It is and will never be the same as when blacks refer to each other. I have to ask, “Why is it important for you, mr. or mrs. Caucasion to use the word?” Why are you jealous that blacks have made your hate benign? Blacks have turned what you set out as negative into something more positive. The serpent’s sting is no more. Why does this trouble you so? Why is it racist when you use it? Because you now whisper it in the dark, amongst your friends, in uncomplimentary fashion: “Them niggers,” “I hate niggers!”, “I don’t want any nigger babies in my house.” And on and on it goes.


To the police officer who asked the question, allow me to ask you a question. When you and/or your friends use the word nigger is it in a positive, friendly fashion towards blacks? It is racist towards blacks when whites use it because it belies the false presentation of equality and acceptance by the whites who use it. And please hold off from the “Eminem Factor,” the white individual who identifies with the hip-hop community. You do not belong to this group nor do you accept this group nor do you have kind words for these individuals. What I will say to this group of white individuals is find another word. Respect the history of the word and find another word to use. That simple.


I hope this answers the question.